this is matt

This may warrant its own category soon.

Per Kate‘s suggestion, we put a new trap out there with a little soap in it to break the surface tension of the beer. So far it’s working like I imagine poisoned blood would work on a shark infestation. The creepy little jerkfaces are going in and – most importantly – not coming out.

We may still need to try out Elen‘s suggestion, Chemfree Insectigone Earwig Killer. The beer basically only gets the ones that venture out of the bushes outside our windows — we may need to take the battle to their home. We’ll see.

I don’t think they like cheap beer. I saw a few swimming around in it Monday night, but they weren’t there yesterday morning. Maybe I need a slipperier container for the beer?

Sarah suggested that perhaps they just don’t like lite beer. This may require further study.

This is one of those situations where I really wish I liked beer so I could experiment with several different kinds and just drink what the earwigs didn’t want.

I’ll leave the crappy… I think it was Busch? … out on the ledge for another night and then see what’s going on. So far, the grape Smirnoff is winning, though.

I didn’t make it into work last Thursday. The reason? Earwigs. Those creepy little bastards were all up in our business, probably getting in through the giant hole in the screen and then gaps in the window track before crawling on my wife and making her shriek and jump and scare the animals.

Earwigs.

I didn’t get much sleep Wednesday night, but prior to descending into blissful darkness, we decided to strike back. I taped up the screen and Sarah put alcohol outside on the window ledge. We’d heard that earwigs were drawn to beer, but lacking that we used some girly-flavored Smirnoff.

It was okay.

When we made our grocery run last night, we got cheap beer. I took a can out, dumped the vodka, and poured the beer into the plastic container. As I stepped out of the bushes, I noticed a lady taking pictures of me with her camera phone. Somehow I don’t think she was trying to document my daring application of science.

If she has a blog, I bet those pictures end up on it. Let’s try to find it! Key words in your search might include:

• guy
• apartment
• beer
• window
• bushes
• no idea what he was doing

Let’s do this! First person to find it wins something awesome.